What it means to be a Slayer.
by Ginger2
Summary: This is a Buffy/Dark Angel cross over. What would have happened if Buffy didn't come back for season 6, what if she came back years in the future in Max's world.
1. What happened after she died

1 Title: What it means to be a Slayer.  
  
2 Author: Ginger  
  
Email: Katharina_angel1@hotmail.com  
  
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters. They belong to Joss Whedon and UPN and Fox  
  
Rating: PG13 for now  
  
Summary: Buffy and Dark Angel Crossover.  
  
Authors note: Hope you like it. It's my first fanfic.  
  
3 Timeline: After Buffy dies and Whatever ep. I saw last night around 17 or something this season in Dark Angel.  
  
Feedback: Please Review I love reviews and they make me update sooner.  
  
~*~  
  
Prologue  
  
Author's note: This first part is written as a journal entry. The other chapters will be written normally. I just thought it was easier to describe what was happening if Buffy told it.  
  
~*~  
  
4 My world has been destroyed. Not literally, but close to it, the world still revolves, and people still live in it ignoring the demons, but my own personal world is gone. My friends, my family, gone.  
  
Every night I go out and do my duty, not knowing if this night will be my last. I have been here for a month now. The first few weeks were hard. Everything here is hard and cruel. Finally after a month I have gained enough courage to go out in the world. Tomorrow I will investigate my new home, in the day light.  
  
It occurred to me today that I should start a journal. Giles always kept a record of everything that happened to me, since he is dead, I figured I should continue on the tradition.  
  
So here it is. Everything that has happened to me since he last wrote. Well first and foremost I died. I jumped off a tower built by insane people to yet again save the world and my sister. When I woke up I was in heaven. I was at peace. My friends slowly joined me there, we never actually talked to one another, but somehow I just knew they were finally at peace, as they deserved. I knew everything anyone ever needed to know, I knew who I was and what my purpose, destiny and goal were and I knew they were complete.  
  
Years passed in this bliss, until I was called before the powers, along with the other slayers. As soon as I walked into the hall I took the form of my old body. I was dressed in a white flowing robe, with no sleeves, and a gold band encircled my arm. When I looked around, I saw thousands of other girls, from hundreds of different countries, dressed as I. Most appeared younger than I, they probably hadn't survived as long. Most of us don't make it to 18.  
  
I walked over to an emptier area, while enjoying the feeling of having a body, and waited. I don't know how I knew to wait but I did. Finally a man and woman appeared, dressed similarly as me only in bluish, green robes and green vines crawling up their arms.  
  
All of a sudden they started to speak, and it was the most beautiful sound I have ever heard. Their voices intertwined to create a perfect harmony. "Ladies, the world is in peril, and yet again it calls upon you to save it." pictures of demons and vampires, growing stronger killing. Slayers dying one after another, never having a chance to learn how to harness their power, pained me.  
  
"Their power was growing, even before the country of America was attacked."  
  
Images of a bomb dropping, a pulse going through the country destroying everything electrical. Afterwards the corruption, and the pain, the poor were put in, raced through my mind.  
  
"Now they thrive every where, little is done about it, even though the government knows what is happening. Most officials are on someone's pay role, more often than not a demons." More images flooded into my mind, causing pain. It had been so long since I felt the pain of death, and the need to help.  
  
"We will be sending 5 of you down at a time, we are sorry, but there is nothing else that we can do. We can not destroy evil, because evil exists in everything. There is a balance that must be kept, and until that balance is reached, the human race has no chance at living. You may wonder why we just don't create more slayers, well it is simple, they could not train in time. Yet again we are sorry." Calming images meant to pacify us, and remove some of the pain we were all in, now entered my mind.  
  
"The first five will be the strongest slayers ever, in order of their calling. First, the fist slayer" the fist slayer walked up to the powers. I felt relived, at least I can rest some more before they call me, maybe it will be over by then. Three more girls walked up, as their names were called. Then to my horror I heard, "and lastly, Buffy Anne Summers."  
  
I stood still for an instant before walking deftly up to the powers. The woman walked over to us and slowly went from one of us to another and said something softly to us before touching us, and sending us off into a deep slumber. I don't know what she said to the others, but to me she said this, "Just remember, your strength comes from your connection with yourself and others. You have studied long and hard not because you were forced to but because you wanted to. To most being the slayer is just their duty. They have no reason to want to live, they have no knowledge of what they fight for. Your emotions are your strongest weapons. You lust for life knowing how precious it is, it is what draws people to you, and as long as you have friends to protect and to care for you, you will make the right decisions, and you will continue to fight the good fight. The problem with the council's methods is that they do not realize one simple fact. Even if Slayers are meant to save the world, you are still simply humans, and every person on the earth needs human connection. That is the meaning of all life, without connections you do not have anything to fight for, you might as well not exist." With that she touched my head and whispered, "remember this and you will continue to be the strongest slayer ever."  
  
I then fell into a deep sleep only to waken here, in this demolished country. For the first few days I stayed hidden in an abandoned building, just trying to calm my senses, block out the noise and smells.  
  
Air tastes you know. I never noticed it before but air tastes, it tastes sweet in the forest and bitter in the city.  
  
I am tired of hiding during the day now. Only venturing out at night to hunt and get food. When I first arrived I had a pair of jeans on and a red tank to with a zip up sweatshirt on. I also wore a backpack with some food and money, most of it has run out now, yet another reason to go out. I have avoided life for to long. I still remember what the power said to me, that my strength comes from my connections with others. I have to go out and join the world of the living if I am to make a difference in the world, maybe when I am finished I can go to sleep again."  
  
~*~  
  
Author's note: Please review. I have 2 stories going on right now and whichever story has the most reviews I update sooner.  
  
~*~  
  
Favorite Quote:  
  
Buffy: "Dawn, listen to me. Listen: I love you. I will always love you. This is the work that I have to do. Tell Giles I... tell Giles I figured it out, and I'm O.K. Give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now. You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live... for me."  
  
I figured this quote kind fit the chapter. But don't worry I'll have better quotes to come. 


	2. The Meeting

Chapter 2:  
  
Author's note: Thanks for all the great review to all of you except whoever signed "ugh" if you hate all my writing so much don't read my fanfics, because you seem to have read both. Comments like yours are not appreciated and obviously you have some problems if you are reviewing people like that, you need to work on you issues. To the rest of you thank you so much, you're what makes doing this so great.  
  
1 Max walked into Jampony late as usual. "YO, Max my girl, what's kickin?" asked Original Cindy.  
  
2  
  
3 "Notin much, you know the whole lack of sleep gets to a girl now and then." answered Max. She had heard her trying to wake her up this morning but had decided to fake sleep and come in late. Her stomach still hurt from being attacked the night before last. Some guy had jumped her looking to rob her. He got a lucky shot in with his knife, and cut her stomach up pretty back.  
  
Max hadn't told Original Cindy about it, because she didn't need another person treating her like a child. Everyone forgets I'm a fighter, a solider who was not only trained form birth, but genetically engineered to withstand pain.  
  
'Hey you don't mind it all the time,' said a little voice in her head. 'It's kinda nice sometimes to be normal, your just all messed because you think you have to be strong now that a war will start soon, between transgenics and humans. They have to find out sometime.'  
  
"You better think of a better excuse than that fast girl, because here comes the boss man and he doesn't look happy." replied Original Cindy bring Max out of her thoughts.  
  
"Pip, Pip people, we're running a delivery service here, not a social hangout." Looking over at Max. "What's your excuse this time?"  
  
"Women problems" replied Max and started to turn around thinking the matter over.  
  
"Not so quickly slacker. Look at this." he handed her a calendar with about 6 X's on it at random spots. "This is the amount of times you have used that excuse this month. Try again."  
  
"Listen Normal, I'll get my doctor to write you a note, I really was sick, my periods been going all wacky this month." Normal began to pull out another chart. " Honest I'll bring a note this time." she spoke up before he found the chart he was looking for.  
  
"Fine missy you better. Now don't just think since you came in late you can get out of work." he passed her about 5 boxes. "You get the packages no one wants to take because they're in the, really bad parts of town." He started to walk away to encourage more people to work with his bothering.  
  
"What no 'stay safe' or 'take a friend so you don't die'" Max shot back at him.  
  
"Nope, if you die, I'll hire someone else, and maybe they'll know how to get to work on time."  
  
Max stuck her tongue out at his back before grumbling to herself and making her way out.  
  
~*~  
  
'My god it's bight out here' thought Buffy. She was walking along the middle of the road in a nearly deserted area of town. There was litter everywhere, and gangsters loitered on the streets.  
  
'Hey babe, you need some protection. Your all alone here, in such a bad part of town." said some slime-ball looking to get some.  
  
Buffy ignored him and tried to get around. She moved almost as if she was in a dream state, not fully able to comprehend what was happening. She had been out of touch with this type of situation for so long she didn't react as well. All she wanted to do was punch, him but he was human and humans couldn't be hurt.  
  
"Hey you, stay away from her!"  
  
Buffy spun around to see a dark hared, thin and very beautiful girl, sitting on a bike.  
  
"What you gonna do about it little girl." Sneered the man back at her, trying not to show his nervousness. First this was an easy takedown now there was two against one. He still could win but it wouldn't be an easy fight. "Anyway, nothing going on here... only asking this girl if she needed some help. But since you're so eager to butt in you can help her." With that he walked off.  
  
"Hey, you ok?" Max asked gently. The girl looked lost and confused. Her blonde hair was messed and dirty, her clothes probably hadn't been washed in ages, she looked scared and confused. But all the same Max could see that she was something special, she had and aura of strength around her, and something else.  
  
Buffy looked up at the girl who had helped her, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little confused." She looked around taking in her surroundings.  
  
"Do you need a place to crash for the night, you know have a shower and get cleaned up." Max had no idea why she had just said that, it just popped out. 'Why is this girl affecting me this much. I see homeless people all the time, it's part of the city.' "I'm Max by the way." Max smiled softly.  
  
"Sure, why not. I'm Buffy."  
  
~*~  
  
Author's notes: Hey so I hope you like this. I promise it will be longer this time. I had such a hard time coming up with how they should meet, that when I finally got it I figured I better post it. And if any of you are wondering, Buffy and Max are not going to get together. What Max is feeling is the strength and power of the slayer. A huge thanks to everyone that reviewed you guys make writing worth it. Please continue to review. Remember whichever story gets the most reviews I work on first.  
  
~*~  
  
Favorite Quote: This is a huge quote. But I wanted to show the whole thing even if it is so long. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks to Specks for suggesting it. I copied this quote from http://studiesinwords.de/buffy.html I hope that's ok.  
  
Buffy: Angel.  
  
He hears her say his name and briefly glances in her direction before looking back out over the rooftops. Buffy slowly walks over to him.  
  
Angel: I bet half the kids down there are already awake. Lying in their beds... sneaking downstairs... waiting for day.  
  
Buffy: (out of breath) Angel, please. I need for you to get inside. Th- there's only a few minutes left.  
  
Angel: I know. I can smell the sunrise long before it comes.  
  
Buffy: (anxiously and hurried) I don't have time to explain this. You just have to trust me. That thing that was haunting you...  
  
Angel: (interrupts) It wasn't haunting me. It was showing me.  
  
Buffy: (confused) Showing you?  
  
Angel: What I am.  
  
Buffy: (insistently) Were.  
  
Angel: And ever shall be. I wanted to know why I was back. Now I do.  
  
Buffy: You *don't* know. Some great evil takes credit for bringing you back and you buy it? You just give up?  
  
Angel: (harshly) I can't do it again, Buffy. I can't become a killer.  
  
Buffy: Then fight it.  
  
Angel: It's too hard.  
  
Buffy: (desperately) Angel, please, you *have* to get inside.  
  
Angel: It told me to kill you. You were in the dream. You know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again.  
  
Buffy: I know what it told you. What does it matter?  
  
Angel: (raises his voice) Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you, and I know it'll cost me my soul, and a part of me doesn't care.  
  
He sobs. Buffy is at a loss for words.  
  
Angel: Look, I'm weak. I've never been anything else. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy. It's the man.  
  
Buffy: You're weak. Everybody is. Everybody fails. Maybe this evil did bring you back, but if it did, it's because it needs you. And that means that you can hurt it.  
  
Angel doesn't want to believe her.  
  
Buffy: (pleadingly) Angel, you have the power to do real good, to make amends. (raises her voice) But if you die now, then all that you ever were was a monster.  
  
She looks out at the sky as it begins to lighten.  
  
Buffy: (begging frantically) Angel, please, the sun is coming up!  
  
Angel: Just go.  
  
Buffy: I won't!  
  
Angel: What, do you think this is simple? You think there's an easy answer? You can never understand what I've done! Now go!  
  
Buffy: You are not staying here. (grabs his arm) I won't let you!  
  
Angel: I said LEAVE!  
  
He jerks his arm free of her grasp. In her anger and desperation Buffy punches him. He reacts by shoving her away from him roughly, making her fall face forward, hard to the ground.  
  
Angel: (quietly to himself) Oh, my God...  
  
He goes to her and crouches over her, grabbing her by the shoulders and turning her around to face him. Buffy fears his intentions and cries out.  
  
Buffy: No! No!  
  
He grabs her roughly by the arms and holds her firmly.  
  
Angel: Am I a thing worth saving, huh? (shakes her) Am I a righteous man? (shakes her) The world wants me gone!  
  
Buffy: (tearfully) What about me? I love you so much... And I tried to make you go away... I killed you and it didn't help.  
  
She shoves him off of her and gets up.  
  
Buffy: (crying) And I hate it! I hate that it's *so* hard... and that you can hurt me *so* much. (sobs, then harshly) I know everything that you did, because you did it to me. Oh, God! I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. (whispers) I can't.  
  
Angel gets up now, too.  
  
Angel: Buffy, please. Just this once... let me be strong.  
  
Buffy: Strong is fighting! It's hard, and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together  
  
Angel struggles with himself, knowing she's right.  
  
Buffy: (resolvedly) But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world, then I don't know what can. But do *not* expect me to watch. And *don't* expect me to mourn for you, because...  
  
She stops in mid-sentence because it has inexplicably begun to snow. She and Angel both look up at it coming down, lightly at first and gradually heavier. The camera pulls up above them and shows them standing there with the snowflakes swirling around them in the gentle morning breeze, and the ground around them starting to become white. Cut to Angel, looking around in amazement. Buffy walks to the edge of the hill and looks out at the town as the roofs on the houses below also start to become white. She turns to Angel, and they look at each other, stunned by this apparent miracle. 


	3. Resolve

*Authors note: thanks to you all for all the great reviews. You guys rock.  
  
~*~  
  
"So this is it." Said Max as she entered her apartment, as Buffy followed cautiously behind. "The bathrooms in there and you can sleep on the coach." She pointed to the piece of furniture. ' I wonder what's up with this girl. She said her name was Buffy. Weird name, then again I bet there aren't many girls named Max.' "Listen I have to go out for a bit, work you know. Anyway, you can just hang out here, kay. My roomy and me will be back here in a couple of hours."  
  
"Your roomy?" Asked Buffy startled, 'I thought I was doing good. Taking it slow, meeting one person at a time. Now I have another person to deal with.... Hey what am I saying. Max is very nice, she helped me and offered me a place to stay. I'm sure her roomy is just as nice.' Buffy thought to herself trying to calm down. 'This world is so strange and angry, it's way worse than it ever was during my time.'  
  
"Yeah, her names Original Cindy. You'll like her. She's really nice, and gives a wicked massage." Said Max gently. 'Boy she's really out of it, she blanched at the thought of meeting anyone. I wonder what she's been through in the last bit, must have been really awful. But she's strong she'll get through it, it can't be even close to what I went through as a kid.'  
  
Images of Manticore flashed through her brain. –Beatings – training – brain washing -- seizures – the escape – the fear she had to live with each day. Max shuddered involuntarily.  
  
Buffy noticed the shudder instantly. Her senses had been on high alert, ever since she was attacked. She had forced herself out of her daze and to become aware of what was around her. The difference in the city, from when she had left, was horrible. She could only imagine what LA must now be like.  
  
As Buffy and Max had made there way to the center of town earlier, Buffy had come to a startling realization about the state of the world. The stench of poverty in the streets had harassed her senses, forcing her to realize that the state of the area she had been hiding in wasn't contained to that section of town. The bad part of town was now the whole city. As she passed through the streets, she could almost smell the blood spilt, on the streets every night. Buffy had looked around at the people, the fate they suffered may not have been caused by demons, but the death the faced each night was.  
  
Now sitting in Max's apartment she finally understood what she must do. ' I can't be afraid anymore. Evil is winning, humanity is dying, and it is my duty to protect the world from the creatures in the dark. I can't block out the world anymore, I have to accept my fate, I am humanities protector, and humanity is not going to survive much longer, unless things start to change. Its time I took control again. Evil beware, the Slayer's back!' Determination swept though Buffy like a drug.  
  
"Hey, Max?" asked Buffy suddenly. Her appearance had changed drastically since she last spoke seconds before, she no longer looked weak and scared, but once again looked, like the great slayer she was. There was no longer and fear or doubt in her eyes, only strength.  
  
Max stared at her, amazed at the sudden change in her appearance. A minute ago, she looked ready to give up on life, now she looked like a very strong woman, with a mission. "Yup."  
  
"You think you could get me a job, where you work?" asked Buffy tentatively suddenly unsure how she would manage, if Max said no.  
  
"Sure, don't know why you would choose to work for Normal, but the rest of the gang would be glad to have you."  
  
"Thanks," she replied. "Could you just let me shower, I must stink." Buffy smiled he quirky half smile at Max.  
  
"Sure go right ahead girl friend." Max shook her head with amazement, she had a feeling the next little while would be very interesting, if Buffy was planning on hanging around.  
  
~*~  
  
*Authors note: First sorry it was so short but I promise to have the next chapter out soon. Secondly I had a couple of questions come up that I thought I would clarify If anyone else was confused. First, it doesn't say how Buffy's friends die, I never gave exact descriptions of their deaths because of how I wrote the first chapter, as a diary entry, and Buffy was never told how they died. I didn't explain further because of two reasons 1. It would have been very hard to write in since Buffy never was told how they died. 2. I justed figured they would have all died with out her, in the first couple of eps. You know those demons took over, Sunnydale in other words the Hellmouth, they probably would have killed them all, maybe even opened the Hellmouth. I'm not sure if Faith will be in the story or not, I never considered what had happened to her. Lastly, Dark Angel is in it second season about half way through.  
  
*Favorite quotes:  
  
Anya upset: "I don't understand! I don't understand how this all happens. How we go through this. I mean, I knew her, and then she's... there's just a body, and I don't understand why she just can't get back in it and not be dead anymore. It's stupid. It's mortal and stupid. And Xander's crying and not talking. And I was having fruit punch, and I thought, well, Joyce will never have any more fruit punch, ever. And she'll never have eggs or yawn or brush her hair. Not ever. And no one will explain to me why. 


	4. Blessed

Authors note: Thanks for all the reviews.  
  
(This below is my new way of separating sections, I saw another writer doing so and I thought it looked kinda cool. Hope you don't mind.)  
  
!$%&*$%&&^@#%^()%^*(()&*&**$%%&^%^#%&^%$^&*(%^*(^%#$%&*(&$%  
  
  
  
Chapter 4  
  
"Hey Normal!" Yelled Max as soon as she walked into Jampony, "Gotta new slave for you. Her names Buffy, be nice." Max smiled encouragingly to Buffy before she turned towards Normal who was now walking towards them.  
  
"So Missy miss, you want to work here do you.?" Normal continued on before Buffy could answer. "Well let me say this first of all, this is a job, and I'll expect you to work hard. Are you able to do that?"  
  
"Definitely, I'm all with the hard working thing. That's me hard working gal." Buffy said trying to think fast. 'I'm an idiot, why do I always do that when I'm nervous.'  
  
Normal didn't seem to think anything of her babbling and continued to lecture her. "Now you gotta understand since your hanging with 'Miss I'm always sick with out a note from my doctor', I can't trust you right away. I have a few questions for you." Normal grabbed a note pad and a new folder off his desk.  
  
"Don't worry about him, he's just full of himself." Whispered Max to Buffy.  
  
"I heard that!" answered Normal in his annoyed voice. "You're getting sector eleven today because of that."  
  
"But Normal that run will take me the rest of the day. It's in the middle of no where." whined Max.  
  
"You should have thought about that before you mouthed off. You need to learn a little respect. Now go. I'll have a good worker train her. Now you," turning to Buffy, " should learn from that. If you work hard you'll do fine. Now what was I going to do?"  
  
"You had some questions?" Buffy responded timidly.  
  
"Yes, good girl. You know you keep up this nice routine and you may one day be as good a messenger as Alec over there. Now that boy is a gift. The only one of these slackers that does anything." Normal glared at everyone, noticing that half of them where just sitting around talking. "Bip! Bip! People not running a coffee shop here. Now on to you, where do you live?"  
  
Buffy answered his questions trying to sound very dependable and hardworking. It was hard to keep a straight face for some of them, he actually asked if she did drugs. Did he expect anyone who did, to answer yes?  
  
Finally Normal called Alec over, "Alec my man, meet your newest colleague, Buffy. I'm depending on you to show her around, make sure she doesn't pick up any bad habits on the first day. And show her this sector and sector 5, she just moved here so she'll need to learn the city."  
  
"Sure Normal, your the boss." answered Alec, before turning his attention to Buffy. He had watched her come in with Max, and man was she hot. "Let's introduce you to the gang." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and ignoring the instant stiffening of her back and shoulders, directed her towards sketchy and Original Cindy.  
  
"Now for introductions, I as you already know am Alec, the handsome, ever kind"  
  
"Full of him self Smart-Alec." Finished Cindy "Hey I'm OC, Original Cindy, Max's roomy. And this here is Sketchy, though insane he's a good guy. We're all going to crash tonight, you should come."  
  
"I think I'm just going to rest tonight, but thanx," replied Buffy. Over the last ten minuets she had been interrogated then put under the instructions of one of the cutest guys she had ever seen. It was all happening too fast, anyway she needed to get back into patrolling tonight.  
  
"Hey, Buffy," said Alec getting her attention. "We should be going, you know so I can show you around." 'And so I can have you all to my self.' he thought.  
  
"Sure, hey nice meeting you all. Oh and Original Cindy Max told you she said I could stay with you guys for the night right." Asked Buffy, as Alec dragged her off.  
  
"Yup" yelled Cindy to her, then turning to Sketchy, "She told me in my dreams. I tell you Sketchy someone is looking out for this sister."  
  
!@@#!#$%@$%^@#%^$%%&^%^&**(%^(*&*(%^#$*($%&**(%^&()*(^())_&%*()  
  
*Authors note: Please, Please review. Oh and yes B/A means Buffy and Alec for you Dark Angel fans. 


	5. Finding Herself

Authors note: I must apologize for the long wait. I had a really busy Summer. I wrestle (as a sport) and I had practices all summer, for the Summer Games, which I competed in. Then I went camping. Since I had such limited free time I had a very hard time forcing myself to sit and type. But still, that's no excuse, and I really hope you can find it in your heats to forgive me.  
  
!#%#%&^%#%&*#@%&*^#$^*($##%&*()*&^%$@@@%*()_+)*^$#$^&*(()))&^$#  
  
Chapter 5  
  
' I need to do this, its my duty, this is my purpose in life,' thought Buffy. She had been arguing with herself now for nearly an hour. She was wearing some new stretch jeans she had bought after work and a black tank top.  
  
'You've done your bit tonight, you've killed 3 packs of vamps, weak ones at that. You know what, I think they've gotten lazy since you left. You've definitely have to teach them what's what. Anyway, off topic, my point is you deserve a break, didn't the powers say your strength is linked to your connections and friends on this world. Anyway Alec is cute, and you want to dance with him.' a voice in her head that sounded suspiciously like her own argued.  
  
'He is that...' Buffy's mind started to wonder to pleasant Alec thoughts. Quickly realizing that train of thought would only lead to her giving in to her desire for a normal life. 'Traitor!' She called the voice. 'I will not cave in to temptation this time. I can have acquaintances yes. But I refuse to allow anyone, to find out about my slayage. And when people get close to me, they realize I'm not normal, then they start to learn more about me until, well until they figure out I'm the Slayer. Then it's either bye, bye, or they try to do their bit to help. I don't know which is worse, trying to help is nice and all, but in the end it only gets them dead, like everyone else.' Thought Buffy, then adding quietly. 'I don't think I could deal with loosing anyone, or anything else.'  
  
"How about this, you go and find you a nice big bunch of demons and vampires to kill, then you stop at Crash or whatever that place is called. You can have a beer and dance a bit. Then go back to Max's place and crash until the morning. Listen before you say anything, 1st we'll be careful here, no one will find out. 2nd the only way you'll ever fit in here is by doing as they do. You'll be working with these people. You don't have to be best buds with them but if they like you, they're more likely to cover for you, when the need arises. 3rd you have to find a place to live, Max is nice and all but you can stay there for good. And the best way to find a roomy is by meeting people.'  
  
'Fine, I'll go, just stop bothering me. Go back to wherever you came from in my brain and stay there.' Her decision made, Buffy relaxed. 'Well maybe the annoying little voice is right. And if not, well I can always skip town again.'  
  
She had been walking through an alley in one of the poorer sections in town, for nearly 10 minutes, too distracted with her argument to note where she was going. Pausing for a second she listened to the noises of the city. The new sounds on this strange city assaulted her ears after living in Sunnydale for so long, and then heaven.  
  
She rested for a moment and let her being search itself for a familiar foothold. She found it hidden in a corner of her mind. She allowed herself to be, not trying to force herself into a role she was not. She blocked out all her senses and let go of everything, even her own being and in that instant of release, her spirit was able to let go completely, something she had never done for fear of what she would find.  
  
What she found was two unique strands twisted together so tightly that they were one. One strand was that of the slayer. This is what she had feared would end up controlling her when she went to Giles for help after her battle with Dracula. Back then she had never completely let go, for fear she would find the killer Dracula had spoken of. Instead what she found was power and magic. The second strand was her being. It was the person she was born as, who she had been before she was the slayer. All the elements of the woman she was were there.  
  
For the first time she was able to understand, that the slayer was not an invading entity wanting to work its will. But a part of her, all these years she had fought against letting it loose, for fear of what it might to if it had control of her. When in truth, it was not a thing, creature, spirit or being that could control. It was merely the power, what she did with it was up to her.  
  
In those few short moments Buffy stood in that empty alley in the middle of broken down city, in a corrupt America, she found something she had never been able to find in Sunnydale or in Heaven. In Both those places where she had tired to hide the half of herself that was the slayer so deep within that she had nearly forgotten about it. After all she had lived through, Buffy found peace within herself at last.  
  
!#$#^*^%^&&*$%&*())(%#$#&^)()^$#%&*))^$^*(%$#@$%^()^^())_*$#$$&^%#$^*  
  
Favorite Quote:  
  
Jonathan: We have one more award to give out. Is Buffy Summers here tonight? Did she, um...  
  
Jonathan continues: This is actually a new category. First time ever. I guess there were a lot of write-in ballots, and, um, the prom committee asked me to read this. "We're not good friends. Most of us never found the time to get to know you, but that doesn't mean we haven't noticed you. We don't talk about it much, but it's no secret that Sunnydale High isn't really like other high schools. A lot of weird stuff happens here."  
  
Random people form crowd: Zombies! Hyena people! Snyder! (laughter)  
  
Jonathan: "But, whenever there was a problem or something creepy happened, you seemed to show up and stop it. Most of the people here have been saved by you, or helped by you at one time or another. We're proud to say that the Class of '99 has the lowest mortality rate of any graduating class in Sunnydale history." (applause) "And we know at least part of that is because of you. So the senior class, offers its thanks, and gives you, uh, this."  
  
Jonathan produces an award, which is a multicolored umbrella, with a small metal plaque attached to the shaft.  
  
Jonathan: It's from all of us, and it has written here, "Buffy Summers, Class Protector."  
  
The crowd applause and cheering.  
  
Buffy walks to the stage and accepts her award.  
  
@$%#$#^&&*##$&&*%&*#@$&*()$!#%^&*)_+)*^$@@$%&^*()_+)&%^$@#@#  
  
Authors note: Well the end of another chapter draws near and I have to thank any of my old readers for returning. I hope to get the next chapter out sooner. Reviews are always appreciated. Thank you. 


	6. Crash

Authors note: WOW the next chapters out with-in the week. I think that's off to the right start. I promise to try to keep this up. Now on with the show.  
  
Chapter 6:  
  
He noticed her the second she entered the club. And watched her look around before noticing him and the gang. He caught her gaze for a second, and gave her a short wave hello, before turning towards Sketchy, and trying to look as if he hadn't been sitting waiting for her, since he got there.  
  
Of course when you're having a convo. with Sketchy you don't really have to hold your own. As long as you pretend you believe the stories he's giving you he keeps on telling them. Then again, Alec realized, that might not be such a great idea for the future, since Sketchy's Stories tend to become more and more impossible as time goes on, and if anyone caught him believing one of them, he would be branded an idiot for life.  
  
He listened for her footsteps as she approached the group of Jampony workers, she slowed down as she neared them and announced her presence.  
  
"Hey Guys." said Buffy "Thought I might take you up on your offer, and check this place out."  
  
The group offered their own friendly greeting, as Alec pulled out a chair next to him for her. As he did this Sketchy leaned over to OC and whispered, "Looks like you might have some competition."  
  
"Just give OC time, if the girls even the slightest bit gay, Original Cindy will get her." replied OC.  
  
Over hearing the exchange, Max added her thoughts, "Boo you know I have the utmost confidence in you abilities, but it would take a blind man not to realize you don't even have a chance there."  
  
All three looked towards Alec and Buffy who were already deep in conversation. "I've never seen him like this," Max confided in OC. "He seems to connect with this girl, it must have something to do with her past. I told you how she looked when I found her."  
  
Meanwhile...  
  
The second Buffy sat down, Alec and her struck up a conversation. Even though neither of them could talk about their pasts, and most of the major parts of their lives, somehow the conversation never waned. Buffy was able to learn more about the city she now lived in as the conversation continued.  
  
'Why in the world do I feel this way,' thought Alec, 'Somehow its like we have this understanding, though how that's possible I don't know. I mean I'm a freak of nature that could kill a normal person with one blow, and was just placed in a city where I don't belong, and am constantly force to fight for my life, while Max and Logan send me on missions to help save the world. While she is... Well she's a beautiful girl who has no idea about things like fighting and be an outcast.' Alec signed inwardly at this thought, underneath the happy exterior he showed to the world, sometimes he just needed to know he had someone by his side who completely understood him and loved him. 'Ha like Buffy will ever be able to understand, she'd probably freak and phone the police, if she ever found out.' But even as he thought those worlds they sounded false.  
  
Buffy had been having a great time, somehow she and Alec just seemed to click even though they had nothing in common and she couldn't talk about anything in her past. 'He's really cute, but I'm sure he knows that.' Her thoughts taking a depressing turn, 'He probably has tons of girls throwing themselves at him all the time. So even if he is interested, he won't be after he realizes that I seem to disappear allot at night, and go through clothes like I've got money to waste.' 'Me and my strange little life... boys just don't fit in very well, maybe it has something to do with my strength.' she mused before turning her attention back to Alec.  
  
"Hey Buffy, Want to dance." asked Alec.  
  
"Sure," replied Buffy smiling as he put his arm around her waist. 'Oh my god, I feel like a giddy teenager, I've danced with tons of guys before. I can't remember feeling like this since, well since Angel.' The mention of that name stopped her cold.  
  
Alec noticing her stiffen and pause, looked at her with concern, "You OK?" he asked while rubbing her back soothingly.  
  
"Yeah, fine." she replied unconvincingly. He shot her a look that said, he didn't believe it but didn't want to push her. "I'm fine really, I just thought of someone I haven't thought about in a long time. But sad thoughts go away when you dance, so come on." With that she started walking towards the dance floor followed closely by Alec.  
  
Later that Night  
  
Max, Buffy, and OC were relaxing in the living room, doing their nails and gossiping after coming back from Crash.  
  
"So... what's with you and Alec?" asked Max, who was smiling at the obvious discomfort that question caused for Buffy.  
  
Blushing, Buffy thought of the slow grinding they had done on the dance floor, and felt the pit of her stomach grow warm, "Well he's really nice, but I'm not sure if I'm ready for a relationship, you know. Relationships and me just don't work, they start of great, but then something always goes wrong just when I think everything's great. But anyway that's my problem. How about you guys, what's your love life like?"  
  
Max smiled sadly at the innocent question that tore at the scabs around the so recent wound in her heart. Buffy noticed the look in Max's eyes and recognized it from her own eyes in the days of Angel.  
  
"Hey, you know what, I'm tired, so how about we just crash. I don't think Normal would appreciate me being late for first full day of work." said Buffy trying desperately for a new subject.  
  
Max smiled her thanks and then, got up to search for some bedding for Buffy, who was going to be sleeping on the couch.  
  
'Hey thanks for not pushing that Question on Max, she's been through a hard time with her boy Logan." whispered OC.  
  
"I found some!" yelled Max, as she walked into the room with a triumphant look on her face, holding up a old sleeping bag and I pillow. "I know it isn't much-"  
  
"But it's about ten times better then what I have been sleeping on." Interrupted Buffy, "Which I am very grateful for"  
  
"Girl we've both been out of luck before," Max indicated OC and herself " and the only good thing about a post-pulse Seattle is that people understand the suffering of others." answered Max, as she walked into her room.  
  
They quickly made up the couch, then OC and Max left to their own rooms, as Buffy fell quickly asleep.  
  
!#$#$$^&*%$^*)&&*())_*^^(_&%%^*()&^$#@#%^*(+)*^%#@#$%^&()__(*^%$##$  
  
Favorite Quote: (From http://studiesinwords.de/71thisyearsgirl2.html )  
  
They stop as they hear a noise from down the alley they are crossing in front of. Xander raises the blaster and switches it on as they start walking into the alley. In the dark they see someone lighting a cigarette with a zippo. The person flips the lighter closed and Spike steps out into the light and sees them.)  
  
Xander: (lowering the blaster)  
  
Spike. Giles: What are you doing here?  
  
Spike: Me? I'm not the one out of place here.  
  
Xander: For your information, smarty, we've got a rogue Slayer on our hands. (turns the blaster off) Real psycho-killer, too.  
  
Spike: (concerned) Sounds serious.  
  
Giles: It is. What do you know?  
  
Spike: (helpfully) What do you need?  
  
Xander: Her. Dark hair, yea tall. Name of Faith. Criminally insane.  
  
Giles: Have you seen her?  
  
Spike: Is this bird after you?  
  
Xander: In a bad way. Yeah.  
  
Spike: Tell you what I'll do then. Head out, find this girl, tell her exactly where all of you are, and then watch as she kills you. (he grins)  
  
(Giles and Xander just stare at him, speechless. Spike rolls his eyes and sighs.)  
  
Spike: Can anyone of your damn little Scooby club at least try to remember that I HATE you all? Just because I can't do the damage myself doesn't stop me from aiming a loose cannon your way. And here I thought the evening'd be dull.  
  
(He starts his way out of the alley, deliberately bumping into Xander's shoulder as he walks past them and takes a long drag on his cigarette.)  
  
Xander: (calling after him) Go ahead! You wouldn't even recognize her!  
  
Spike: (faces them, still walking backwards) Dark hair, this tall, name of Faith. Criminally insane. (turns around) I like this girl already.  
  
(They just stare after him as he walks off. They look at each other.)  
  
Xander: We're dumb.  
  
Authors note: Well as you can see I am getting better. I already have an idea for the next chapter. I was wondering if it was possible for anyone who reads this just to send me a short (or long ) note so I know how many people are reading this. Well anyway thanx and the next chapter will be out hopefully very soon. 


	7. Finally

Authors Note: Wow, I'm a terrible person. I finally had to get so bored at home that I updated. I hate authors like myself. But one thing I have to say is that I am amazed at how many reviews I got. And I want to thank you all so much for that. Everytime someone reviewed I was reminded of this story and felt so good that someone would put in the time to Review. So I just need to say thank you to u all, and promise that I'll try to write in physics and get the next bit done. #$&*($@#$%^&*())*##$%^&*()#$%^&*()$^($%^*&^*()$%$(*&$%^&*%#*&^$#$  
  
Chapter 7:  
  
Buffy rode into Jampony about ten minutes late the next morning with Cindy and Max at her heels, 'So much for making a good impression she thought.'  
  
As if hearing her thoughts Max leaned over and whispered, "Don't worry about being late he'll blame me for it no matter what you say."  
  
Max was right of course, the second Normal saw them, he was blaming Max, " Now missy miss, I'm tired of this behavior, it's bad enough when your late but I don't want you setting a bad example for Buffy here. I'm hoping for a good worker, not a slacker like yourself."  
  
"Fine Normal," Max interjected as Normal took a breath, "I'm sorry, I'll be on time tomorrow." Turning she walked toward her locker.  
  
"YOU better" retorted Normal who was madly searching his office for Max's file so he could mark another "X" on her lates calendar.  
  
Buffy wondered off to her locker to dump her stuff before meeting up with Alec to continue learning the city. At her locker she met Alec, "Hey."  
  
Alec looked at her in wonder for a moment before responding with a greeting of his own. 'How is it that just seeing her can increase my pulse and make me feel happy.' he wondered.  
  
"So we off?" asked Buffy giving him her trademark smile.  
  
"As soon as your ready, I already checked with Normal and he gave me some packages for the sectors we went over last time, this time you lead though." responded Alec, " And we'll see how fast you can get us lost." he added just to tease her.  
  
Buffy responded instantly to the challenge, " we'll see about that, how about if I can deliver the first package without getting lost, you owe me lunch."  
  
"Your on." replied Alec tossing her the first package, and heading toward his bike.  
  
@#(%&$(&^$%$#$%#%^$&**(_(^&$%##$@%^$^%(&^(^&*(%^#$$%#^)*(&)_*(&  
  
"You sir owe me lunch, and I feel hungry," laughed Buffy as she and Alec walked upto a small restaurant he had picked out.  
  
" You cheated," retorted Alec, shaking his head at her cheerfulness.  
  
"You never said I couldn't use a map, you just said I had to lead. So don't even try to get out of it." said Buffy pouting.  
  
That lip was the end of him all he wanted to do was lean over and kiss her. He slowly leaned in and kissed her like he had been thinking of doing since he first saw her.  
  
'Oh my god! he's kissing me. What do I do? This has to stop.... but it feels so good,' with that last thought Buffy gave herself into the kiss.  
  
When they finally separated for air they both just stood staring into eachothers eyes, hopeing the other would speak first. Finally Alec spoke up, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have pushed myself on you like that." He said akwardly.  
  
"No..." replied Buffy timidly and she placed a hand on his arm, "You didn't push." with that she gave him a little smile and then turned to walk into the restaurant. Alec, stared at her in awe of just how amazing she was, before running up behind her and wrapping his arm around her shoulders.  
  
@#%^*$%@$^*)*&^&%^$%@#$%&(^&*%^##@%&$^&^*(*_()&*%%^#@$%$^*(  
  
Favorite Quote:  
  
Giles: "Buffy?" Buffy: "Oh, sorry. It's just...been a really weird day." Xander: "Yeah, Buffy died and everything." Willow: "Wow. Harsh." Giles: "I should have known that wouldn't stop you." Miss Calendar: "Well, what do we do now?" Giles: "I don't know about the rest of you, but I'd like to get out of this place. I don't like the library very much anymore." Xander: "Hey, I hear there's a dance at the Bronze tonight. Could be fun." Cordelia: "Yeah!" Willow: "Buffy?" Buffy: "Sure. We saved the world, I say we party. I mean, I got all pretty." Miss Calendar: "What about him?" Buffy: "He's not going anywhere. Loser!" 


End file.
